Day 2: Grumble Grumble

Day 2 is in the books.  The headache started mid-morning, I took Advil twice. Of COURSE the nap strike from the 2 year old is in full effect, complete with dinner-time-straight-until-bed meltdown. And of COURSE I had some "ladies" issues. And of COURSE my husband was stuck late at work.

I did have urges to eat, but I quieted them down by actively saying in my head "Will eating make this problem better?" "Will gaining weight make the tantrum stop?" I want to get to the point where I can automatically cope without having to [essentially] lecture myself not to go off the rails. Because I'm nervous that when the novelty wears off in a week or two, that I might get complacent and start to "allow" myself little nibbles here and little nibbles there. You know, because I'm human, and I deserve it after a rough day.

I guess that's what I'm hoping to do differently this time. I have to have my inner angel "healthy" person available at all times on one shoulder to convince me that the devil "unhealthy" person on the other shoulder is full of crap. I have to [quite literally] have conversations with myself.  These haven't been happening aloud... yet...

So far so good. My confidence is still lacking, and I haven't been tested in social situations or eating out yet. The confidence isn't going to appear overnight, I have to be patient and kind to myself. If this was easy, there wouldn't be millions of people spending billions of dollars spent every year to get help (quick fixes or otherwise)

Notes:

• Lean & Green: Zucchini Lasagna.  Extra protein (since I didn't have any meat) was a little bit of cheese on my nacho puffs, and a small amount of deli turkey when I was giving my 2YO lunch
• I have to be careful about those little "BLT's" as they used to say from my Weight Watchers Days (Bites, Licks, and Tastes). But that's what this blog is for. If I can't be honest with myself, I won't get anywhere.
• I prepared a lot of dinner (For the family --  meatloaf, and for myself) while Lilah was eating lunch. It was too early for me to eat myself, and it kept me from nibbling. Keeping busy is important for me to stave off the bad habits.
• I did measure the cheese for the lasagna carefully and used the food scale. Go me.
• I had a HUGE case of the munchies after the girls went to bed. This is a big trigger time for me because I finally feel the release of the pressure of taking care of them all day, and it is usually when I want to "reward" myself for surviving, I guess. I had my pudding, and I will probably have a sugar free ice pop.  But I survived another day. Now let's see how those folks on "The Walking Dead" do...